Mostly pity. For example, the first day of school, Mitch looked like this:
This is also what he looked like the second day of school because he wore the exact same clothes. AND HIS MOTHER DIDN'T NOTICE until she picked him up at the end of preschool. He looked at me like I smoked dangerous chemicals when I expressed my concern about wearing a shirt that had yogurt artfully spilled around the collar.
"Mom," he said, "I look awesome."
And then there was the Calendar Confusion Incident a few weeks ago. It was a Monday and I kept Ana home because she had the day off from school. Probably teacher planning or something, I wasn't sure. Mid morning, still all in our pajamas and considering a trip to the science center or maybe a movie and I noticed a fleet-footed thought take a jog through Ye Olde Maternal Head. I wondered why I hadn't heard any other moms talking about their plans for the day off from school. Why? Hmm. Well, turns out there was a simple answer to that question. Other moms didn't have day-off plans because school was in session. People who read calendars with a savvy and literate eye know things like this but people who send their children to school in yogurt-crusty shirts do not.
So I'm warning you now: Do not trust me with important information or the hygienic care of children. You can trust me with pretend stories and fake people that don't exist. Fiction is safe! Anything else, though, and we're all taking our chances.
I'm so glad I'm not alone. Like the day I sent Ethan to daycare in his pajamas, it also happened to be class picture day.
ReplyDeleteWell, let's be honest. He does look awesome. The boy speaks the truth.
ReplyDeleteKim - you are hilarious! Your children will grow up laughing with a mom like you. What a gift. No one noticed the yogurt except you, and Ana didn't miss much! I bet she learned more at home being around you....
ReplyDeleteYou are hilarious. This post is awesome. You are awesome. Mitch does look awesome. Love it. Hope Ana enjoyed her day off from school yesterday. Unless, of course, you decided to send her yesterday to make up for the other Monday she missed. ;)
ReplyDeleteYou make me smile. Mitch looks more than awesome! :) Miss you.
ReplyDeleteYes, but *I* dropped my (then) kindergartner off at school and drove away, inaccessible (this was before cell phones) on an IN SERVICE day. Did not notice the lack of other cars. Went back to pick him up (when I DID notice the lack of cars) and nearly had a meltdown in the halls. (He was with his dad, at work.)
ReplyDeleteTruly AWESOME! Jake wore his Spiderman PJ's one day to preschool, and I knowingly allowed it and even told the teachers as much so there was no confusion. Just one battle i wasn't gonna fight.
ReplyDeleteFunny!
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