About Me

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I write novels, eat dark chocolate, raise three children, love my husband, scrub toilets, ignore the laundry, and love a good story, but hardly ever in that order.

OPERATION BONNET

STRETCH MARKS

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ACT TWO

BOTTOM LINE

BALANCING ACT

Friday, June 10, 2016

Winner, Winner, Organized Chicken Dinner!


Thanks, everyone, for entering and for reading and for admitting you all need you some Jan. I have to say, your entry emails were hilarious. I even received some photos of the most challenging of your spaces,  just to emphasize how badly Jan was needed. 
Photo by Slate.com
This was not one of those photos, but doesn't it just make you want to throw away everything you've purchased since the end of the Reagan administration?

So the winner of our contest is.....MELISSA K.!

Congratulations, Melissa! Jan will be contacting you directly to start the project of your choice. Please take photos, Jan and Melissa, and send them along! We are all suckers for a good before and after.

We are also suckers for a good deal. So remember, all readers of the Kimberly Stuart blog receive 20% off Jan's services until December 31, 2016. Um, you should call her right this second. Her prices are very reasonable and think of how you'll avoid that spot on Hoarders! Twenty percent off AND no national humiliation! A deal, I tell you!
Photo by TinyPic.com
Sorry. I had to do post just one more hoarding photo. I want to know who is posting these things? Why? What are your motives? And why do you own that oversized teddy bear? Get rid of the bear. And the bear shouldn't be next to the fireplace in any circumstance. There is no design philosophy that supports large stuffed animals by fireplaces. OK, and one more.
Photo by ajc.com
Oh, my gosh. I am suddenly and completely, utterly depressed.

Stop looking at this screen. Go call Jan. Go clean your garage. And drink a healthy juice or something. Cleanse.

Happy weekend, everyone. Thanks for entering. ;)

Friday, June 3, 2016

Giveaway! YOU. WANT. THIS.


YOU GUYS.

I'm so excited for you. Because I'm about to change your lives. We have just skidded into the end of the school year around here, and this giveaway is going to perk up that part of you that is secretly groaning with that news.

Oh, just admit it.

Even if you love your children, and let's assume you do love your children, they are messy. And they smell earthy after four minutes outside. And they don't feel the same urgency about clean toilets and sinks and counters that you do. And they make roughly 387,879 snacks for themselves a day BUT NEVER PUT THE SHREDDED CHEESE FROM THEIR QUESADILLAS BACK INTO THE FRIDGE. I speak hypothetically here.

I have an answer for you and her name is Jan Hagen.

Here is Jan with her ridiculously cute grandchildren.
Jan is pretty much the answer to your quesadilla problem and your burgeoning backpack problem and your existential "Why am I here?" problem. OK, maybe not the existential one, but totally the others.

Jan is a professional organizer.

Did you just hear angels sing a little bit? I did. I did hear them sing.

Jan has recently moved to my lovely city and she brings with her many years of organizing and helping and making people feel like their home office ISN'T, in fact the first step into the abyss. She can help you make your garage or attic or basement look less like an episode of Hoarders and more like you're waiting for Martha Stewart to stop by to talk strategy. Jan can help you get a system for paper influx and purge. Just those words, "influx and purge," gave me a happy little chill, especially the "purge" part.

Jan can help you with your closet.
Photo credit: StyleCaster.com
Jan did not actually organize this particular closet. But if Mariah Carey knew Jan, she would totally hire her to help her with all these GOLD SHOES. I can't even pretend I'm not rolling my eyes right now. Oh, Mariah, and your weird life. And your weird sparkly hair.
So here's my good news: If you live within the greater Des Moines area, you could be the lucky winner of four hours of complimentary organizing by Jan from Ship Shape Services! Seriously! Free! Not the $150 it would normally cost you! Happy! Organized! Gold shoes all in order!

Simply email me at kimberly@kimberlystuart.com and say you want to win Jan. You, your laundry room, your crafting area, your photo storage, your mess of closet---you need you some Jan. 

The winner will receive four hours of Jan and her mad skills, but ALL WHO ENTER WILL RECEIVE 20% ANY ORGANIZING SERVICE FROM NOW UNTIL DECEMBER 31, 2016.

The angels continue to sing. Now do you hear them?!

Enter by Thursday, June 9, at midnight. Winner will announced next week on the blog.

Happy weekend and happy winning!